Satirical 4-Panel Product Ads

{
  "type": "4-panel satirical product advertisement grid",
  "layout": {
    "grid": "2x2",
    "panels": [
      {
        "position": "top-left",
        "product_name": "座る石",
        "visual": "man in white shirt and dark pants sitting on a large round stone in a park",
        "catchphrase": "いつでも、どこでも、落ち着ける。",
        "sales_badge": "累計販売数 12,000個 突破!",
        "vertical_text": "公園のベンチが埋まっていた日に。",
        "features_count": 3,
        "features_labels": [
          "重さ約8kgで安定感抜群",
          "底面フェルト加工で傷つけにくい",
          "付属の専用ベルトで持ち運び簡単"
        ],
        "extra_visual": "small inset image of the stone with a leather carrying strap",
        "specs": [
          "耐荷重 150kg",
          "安心の日本製"
        ]
      },
      {
        "position": "top-right",
        "product_name": "磨きたくない人の歯ブラシ",
        "visual": "sleek light blue toothbrush angled diagonally on a dark blue background",
        "toothbrush_text": "I don't want to brush my yeeth.",
        "catchphrase": "持っているだけで安心感",
        "vertical_text": "歯を磨く代わりに、これを持つ。",
        "sales_badge": "シリーズ累計販売数 85,000本 突破!",
        "features_count": 3,
        "features_labels": [
          "気持ちを落ち着けるお守り代わりに",
          "会議や商談前のエチケットに",
          "磨かない選択を、もっと自由に。"
        ],
        "bottom_banner": "歯磨きストレスから、あなたを解放する。"
      },
      {
        "position": "bottom-left",
        "product_name": "雲の貯金箱",
        "visual": "hand inserting a coin into a fluffy white cloud-shaped piggy bank",
        "catchphrase": "空気より軽い、安心感。",
        "sales_badge": "累計販売数 23,567個 突破!",
        "features_count": 3,
        "features_labels": [
          "ふわふわの触り心地",
          "割れないから安心",
          "インテリアに馴染むデザイン"
        ],
        "color_variants_count": 3,
        "color_variants_labels": [
          "blue",
          "pink",
          "white"
        ],
        "price": "¥2,980 (税込)",
        "bottom_text": "今日から、空に向かってコツコツ貯めよう。"
      },
      {
        "position": "bottom-right",
        "product_name": "叱ってくれる石",
        "visual": "round stone on a wooden desk with a pen, text written on the stone",
        "stone_text": "いいかげんやれ",
        "catchphrase": "やる気が出ないあなたへ。",
        "sales_badge": "累計販売数 18,000個 突破!",
        "features_count": 3,
        "features_labels": [
          "見るたびに心を奮い立たせる",
          "厳選された言葉をランダム表示",
          "電池不要、半永久的に叱ってくれる"
        ],
        "phrase_variants_count": 10,
        "phrase_variants_labels": [
          "甘えるな",
          "考えるな",
          "動け",
          "現実を見ろ",
          "逃げるな",
          "寝るな",
          "やればできる",
          "お前ならできる",
          "寝るな",
          "もう言い訳するな"
        ],
        "price": "¥3,500 (税込)"
      }
    ]
  }
}